The Tour Guide, Jenna Curacoa Welcomes You

 No, i'm not actually and I think that's where I lose most people. It's not that i forget. I remember. I really do. and my feelings are very real. I also realize what a monumental waste of time it is to remain angry or to remain holding on to those feelings. In response, I'll handle it later. In response, I ignore it. Yes, i'm aware how unhealthy it is to bundle up emotions.  You see, for that exact reason this is why I do not over indulge in anything. I would prefer to be drunk all day. Would make life much easier. But instead, i hold and save it for an emergency. When i really need a drink. same goes for every other vice or dopamine hit out there. eating and sleep included.  Rather than stay angry and feel those emotions put my mind to other things.  Why do this? What's to come is much worse. What I endure now is nothing compared to what is to hit the world. You laugh and joke now. Do what you may. I don't have time to stay mad. If you could seriously see ...

So, w h y not? Why not just jump into this journey? Why take my time walking into this? Well, you saw what transpired before. Can one come back from that fall? Can I prove I've been the same person at heart? Would it even matter? Can the damage be remedied at this point? I wish I could fix every ache and pain I've caused. So, to answer your question, why I take this process exceedingly slow, that is why. I would not want to cause further offense. In response, here are my random musings. You're free to take what you want from them. I can't apologize for everything, but I do apologize for unintended harm.